Conformity

Life would be bliss had he not intervened
I would move from pleasure to pleasure
Form self-gratification to fulfillment
But he came to save me from myself
The pain he brought upon my being!!!
LEAVE ME ALONE I CRIED!!!!!!
Who am I that you should test me so much?
What did I do to deserve your torment?
Am I not an ordinary man bound to decay?
Why do you test me?
Why do you terrify me?
Why do you hang me over Hades and make me cling for dear life?
Did you create me to toy with me?
Remember the days of old when I tormented the lifeless figures formed by human hands?
Did you O Almighty one form me for the same purpose?
Deceiving me in every step of my life
There is a dread within when these thoughts torment me
I cling to your Holiness, your sanctity and your mercy
My love for you might make me hostile to you
My Sin within might make me lose hope and run away
But thou O Lord are not bound by such constraints
May my soul cling to you if I face the terror of Hell
I cannot live without you
Even in my pain I keep you above all my affections
I cry unto you at all times
Although it seems like you never harken unto me
I know that I am deceived to believe that your uncreated refining fire is the fire of hell
For if it were the fire of hell I would have dissolved into conscious nothingness
But I live, I still have a spark of hope and this O Lord is a testimony to your faithfulness.