Let My Heart Bleed

All my life I labored towards happiness and pleasure
Narrow is the way to pleasure and broad is the way to destruction said some men
I sowed in tears to reap in joy, I ate the bread to sorrow to feast upon the King's table
All my life O Lord all my life I tried but my heart bleeds
I see traces of the blood as I look towards the past
All that remains are scarlet stains upon the ground
I look upon it and I begin to tear
As the first drops fall upon the dry remains
It begins to regain its former glory
I start to run Oh but the power it has over me
Makes me earn to look, my eyes behold my brutal past but my soul beckons me to flee
I cannot and lo I behold the shadow of a teenage boy fighting to end his life
I turn away from its presence and more tears rush to my eyes
And I behold another drop coming to life, in this I see a young man going astray and even filthy canines beckon him to leave the path that even puts them to shame.
I then look at my present state, as I look at the fresh drops of blood my tears magnify its glory
I look into it and I see a young man living free in pursuit towards the knowledge that this world can offer.
What is greater than knowledge my mind enquires? Is it not more valuable than gold and silver?
Is it not better to seek knowledge than to seek the cares and riches of this world?
I still look upon the swollen drop of blood, wondering why my life bleeds when I pursue something fit for a king.
This makes me tear even more, my teardrops magnify the suffering as I kneel to the allmighty and beckon him to end my suffering.
Then a muscular figure in the dark advances and drags me reluctantly towards the forbidden path of the future and the path which he leads me is towards knowledge.
My tears begin to dry for I knew that whosoever sows in tears will reap in joy, but to my horror I beheld giant drops of blood surrounding me and I was engulfed by one.
I enter the presence of an aged man, I see that he is surrounded by knowledge at its glory, books and books and my eyes enlighten as I open one but a grave presence forbids me to do so
It is not wise he said to pursue the ways of the world
I looked at the stranger and it was me, a man of forty who seemed like a one nearing his end
I began to tear but he wiped it away and I asked him " Why art thou in this state? When did you reap what was sown? Did I not sow knowledge? Is it not more precious than silver or gold? Where is the love of my life? Do you have children to light up your day?"
I failed not to sow but I failed to reap, I sow today that I might reap someday but the day I reap will never appear for I am bound to die in a year, I sowed the knowledge of the world and now I reap its wages eternal death, had I sought the master of this life I would have reaped in joy for he cannot be compared to silver or gold, the love of your life lies in the arms of another for she loved you but like her brother, as for children I have none for that was the sacrifice of my life, as for love I thought that it was just a selfish pursuit to failure.
But I am happy that I will one day end this agony fade away and will only face the eternal one.

Then I awoke from my dream and cried that night and vowed to meself that I would regard eternal wisdom above all the knowledge in this world.

A Tribute To John Bunyan

I saw you in my dream
You sat in green pastures with your pen and parchment
Churning out wisdom and truth as you beheld them
Your fingers strive to pen the divine
In the foolish language of even the Queen.

I saw you tear your hair
As you sat down there to unmask God's mysteries
You did not give up hope despite the paralysis of your mind
You took upon yourself to save man from deception
But what is thy fate my father, evil hath marked thee for destruction.

I saw as they took you to prison
Apparently for no reason but for speaking God's truth
As your neighbors mourned with agony at their fate
You accomplished something you could not in your freedom
You revealed to us the mysteries as our dear Lord did.

I saw the ink blot your parchment
As Christian sprung into being
You created him with the power of your letter
You breathed into his nostrils the breath of quest
And in his heart thou didst light the fire of hope.

I saw you strive in your short and violent life
They tried to take away your freedom by limiting your flesh
But your soul was always as free as the freedom that you inherited
I saw you soar although they taught you were constrained
I saw you smile as I read your lines.